人际暴力 (sexual assault, 跟踪, 骚扰, relationship abuse) impacts many people on college campuses, 联合国大学也不例外. 其他形式的暴力, 比如微侵犯, 刻板印象, and identity-based 骚扰 are also present here. Everyone in our community has a role to play in creating a UNH free from violence, and showing up as an active bystander is a vital way to shift social norms and prevent harm.
野猫是积极的旁观者
As a bystander, you may wonder what you can do to help.
Sometimes, active bystanders are needed in heightened or escalating incidents of explicit violence. 其他时间, active bystanders serve to disrupt the use of offensive language, 伤人的玩笑, 或者将评论客观化. 不管情况如何， recognizing a potentially dangerous or harmful situation and choosing to intervene is active bystander behavior.
It's not always easy to show up as an active bystander. There's a lot that can get in the way: fear of judgment, 缺乏自信, 安全问题, 知识或技能上的差距, 权力失衡, 害羞...这样的例子不胜枚举. 最终, choosing to act means deciding that your responsibility to our community and the risks of inaction outweigh these various barriers and concerns about intervening.
Steps to becoming an Active Bystander[1]
- 注意情况: 注意你周围的环境.
- 把它理解为一个问题: Recognize that someone needs help or that something harmful is occurring.
- 感到有责任采取行动: See yourself as being part of the solution.
- 知道该怎么做: Have a toolbox of strategies for intervening.
- 干预安全: Take action while foregrounding others' safety as well as your own.
如何安全干预
There are different ways you can choose to intervene. Some are better suited to certain situations, some are better suited to certain types of personalities, 的关系, 或设置. There is no one-size-fits-all blanket approach to being an active bystander. The type of action you take should depend not only on the situation, but on your safety and comfortability/confidence with that method.
The 5 D's of 旁观者干预
Approach the person causing harm, name the inappropriate behavior.
- “You’re making them uncomfortable. 请停止.”
- 这个词真的很伤人. 你能换个吗?”
- “They’ve asked you to leave them alone. 现在我也在问.”
Create a diversion to 中断 harm and/or give the target an opportunity to remove themselves.
- “Hey, come be my partner for pong!”
- “Someone in the kitchen is looking for you.”
- Pretend to "accidentally" spill or drop something to shift attention or diffuse a situation.
Ask someone else for help, such as a supervisor, bouncer, RA, friend, etc.
- “你能过来一下吗?? 有人要发火了.”
- “Can you help me brainstorm some ideas?”
- “你会帮忙吗?”? I’m worried but not sure what to do.”
Create a record of the incident or situation.
- Record video or take photos (do not share or post these without asking permission first).
- Write down what you see with specific details, noting date & time.
- “Do you mind if I start recording?”
Circle back later if you didn’t intervene in the moment.
- “I’ve been thinking about something you said yesterday…”
- “Can we talk about what happened this morning?”
- “I heard raised voices the other day and wanted to check in on you.”
What can my friends and I do to be safe?
作为一个社区. 记住这些建议:
制定计划.
Talk with your friends about your plans for the night 之前 你出去. 你觉得 喝? 你对……感兴趣吗? 勾搭? 你想去哪里? Having a clear plan ahead of time helps friends look after one another.
一起出去玩.
Go out as a group and come home as a group; don't leave your friend(s) behind.
小心别人.
If you notice someone walking alone, ask if they want to join you. If you see that someone's heavily intoxicated, check in on them. If you hear someone being harassed or catcalled, say something.
扩散情况.
If you see a friend coming on too strong to someone who may be too drunk to make a consensual decision, 中断, 分散, 或者改变形势. If you are too embarrassed or shy to speak out, get someone else to step in.
检查.
Don't assume that it will always be obvious when someone is fearful, distressed, or hurt. 检查 with the people around you and demonstrate that you care.
以身作则.
It often takes one to go first; this makes it acceptable for others to follow. Be a leader and set an example of active bystander behaviors in your communities, 朋友组, 教室, 和组织.
了解你的资源.
You are never alone in the work of anti-violence, harm prevention, and community care. 了解你的资源, even if think you'll never need them - someone else might, and connecting others to help is a powerful way to show up as an active bystander.
Being a part of the UNH community means living by a collective standard.
The standard that we relate to each other with respect and responsibility. The standard that everyone deserves bodily autonomy, that everyone deserves safety.
There is so much more to learn about the field and practice of bystander intervention. If you think that your class, org, chapter, team, etc. could benefit from a bystander intervention workshop, request SHARPP's "你可以帮忙" program!
[1] Latane, B. & 达利,J.M. (1970)
